Wow. Married for 20 years and not knowing it. I’m not sure what to say, Janeane. I really want to defend you in this matter but I’m at loss for words. I’m not sure “It was his fault, too” is gonna cut it. Of course, I’ve already seen how many people have taken pot shots at you over this. Oh wait; you two were drunk at the time, not stoned.
Despite the criticism over the stupidity of this, I still think you’re smart. I also remember how much you made me laugh when I saw you at The Improv. I also find you attractive despite the many times I’ve heard people express their opinions otherwise. I have to admit it: I feel excited to know you are freshly available.
Jesus still loves you, Janeane. Even though you spell your name funny, look cute and funny, act funny, dress funny, and now are known for doing something funny. Notice how I did not use quotes around the word “funny.” Until just then.
Call me. I think we should go over this together. When we have that day, and all the “technically adulterous acts” over two decades are revealed, I want to make sure your defence is properly constructed.
I really want to forgive you, in my heart.